


His Story

by DraiochtEve



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gender-Neutral Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Grief/Mourning, Hope, Hopeful Ending, Just Bear With Me, Loss, M/M, Other, Regret, Reunions, Second Chances, Support G'raha and his wobbly legs 2k19, Tags will be added as new chapters come, Thancred the callout machine, also known as "this WoL is an idiot", complete at last, it will have a happy ending I promise you, let G'raha be happy dammit, save these idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2020-08-11 02:08:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20145826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DraiochtEve/pseuds/DraiochtEve
Summary: “Don’t....fear...my friend.” He choked out, doing his best to put on a brave smile, “My story…always...led here. I’ve done...my part.”Chapter 1 (Prelude): DeathChapter 2: BreatheChapter 3: MournChapter 4: LongingChapter 5: EmbraceChapter 6: Move Forward*This fic explores the concept of G’raha passing on the First and awaking on the Source. Prepare your heart. Was written around 5.1.





	1. Death

**Author's Note:**

> Will attempt to update regularly while the iron is still hot. I have a plan for this one, so hopefully it all falls into place. Chapter 1 will be drastically shorter than the others as it is a prelude, so please look forward to longer chapters.

Cold. He felt cold. Shockingly, it was foreign to him despite having known the crystal’s influence for decades, this sensation far more empty and suffocating, lacking the vibrant warmth of aether. He was aware that people were shouting, some running to him, yet he could not hear or see them. All he could sense clearly was the slowing of his breathing and the cold.  
  
Someone was grabbing him, pulling him close to their form, the faintest sensation of heat reaching him. They were scared, crying, and pleading for it to stop. He was off his feet now, his limbs dangling limply, refusing to respond to any movement he hoped to give them. A pressure on the top of his head. A hand? No, a cheek.  
  
_ Oh, it’s the Warrior...they are holding me… _   
  
His mind felt like it was filled with water as he struggled to remember how to talk, the cold consuming his legs and creeping up the back of his head, making him wince.  
  
“Don’t....fear...my friend.” He choked out, doing his best to put on a brave smile, “My story…always...led here. I’ve done...my part.” That’s what he had always convinced himself when his late-night thoughts landed on his inevitable death. It felt less painful than he had imagined it, but it still felt wrong; terrifying. The cold was taking him over, hardly anything left for him to feel.  
  
_I hate being cold._

  
The Warrior was screaming now, trying to bargain with gods and all manner of powerful beings to reverse the transformation. There would be no reply. Not even the tower itself would answer, this being what he had agreed to do. He served dutifully as its keeper, borrowed energy, used it to travel space and time, increased his life far beyond what should have been possible, and this was the payment. His debt would be paid.  
  
He felt a tear slide down his cheek, the last warmth of his body traveling with it. With one final breath, he whispered his dying wish to his dear comrade, his inspiration, his hero.  
  
“...live…”  
  
And the void swallowed him, sending him into a realm of everlasting darkness.


	2. Breathe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just how many second chances can one man be given before his luck runs out?

Darkness and that damned cold were his coffin as his soul drifted. Faint glimmers of light caught his eye and would vanish as quickly as they came, stealing echoes of his life with them. His childhood, the ostracization because of his eye, his journey for the truth, entire nights spent buried in tomes looking for answers...all pieces of himself he had long suppressed and pushed away when he became the Crystal Exarch, not needing the pain of his past weighing him down. Then there was the tower, Cid and Rammbroes, the Warrior frustratingly playing his little game before joining the expedition, late nights discussing theories, long days spent exploring, the truth revealing itself, and the bittersweet goodbye as he sealed himself away for a better tomorrow.  
  
His aether stirred as the memories became more vivid, colors shifting from cool hues to violent reds and he trembled. Flashes of explosions and cries of terror rang all around him as the tears he shed as he discovered what had befallen his beloved hero stung his cheeks once more. Determination for a second chance, the hope that he could find a way to reach into the cosmos and change fate, the hours ticking away as he rushed to rewrite history...the bombardment of emotion assaulted his very core. So much pain and so much fear, but never could he say it was all for naught. Every drop of sweat, every cry of frustration, every sacrifice, led to the First: the people of Norvrandt fighting tooth and nail to survive, the Crystarium and the Tower becoming a beacon of hope, his transformation into the Crystal Exarch...Lyna...Katliss...Moren...so many others he fought to protect...the ones he failed to do so forever haunting his mind...it was all so overwhelming and still so much of the tale left to tell.   
  
He recalled the next memories before they had the chance to shoot by, holding each one in his heart fondly as they poured out: His preparations made for his long-awaited guest, his repeated failing at summoning them and instead, pulling the Scions into the First, the plan he shared with Urianger, the Warrior’s arrival at last, and their quest to save both realms from destruction. A marvelous tale for the ages which he had been so sure he knew his place in. Yet, his scheduled demise was cut short, etching himself more into the story and granting him precious time with the one he cherished most.   
  
But...   
  
Time always runs out.   
  
Part of him was thankful he couldn’t feel the sensation of the crystal slowly consuming him anymore, but this void he was now trapped in left him longing for it just to have one more moment with the Warrior. There was so much left he wished he could have said and so much he wished he had done. However, he had said and done what he needed to, that would have to be enough.

His life journey finally at its end, he let go of what he knew and accepted the finality of it all. He_ had _played his part, the one person he lived for still breathed, and had plenty of adventures to live. He found peace in that. G’raha Tia had lived. And now, it was time for him to die  
  
The darkness stilled and that cold suddenly seemed lukewarm as he turned himself over to fate. The twinkling lights of G’raha’s memories surrounded him like flowers upon a deathbed and his aether stirred happily, being enveloped in their warmth, but there was a glimmer of sadness that grew in his core. What could have been? If the Tower hadn’t claimed him so abruptly, what words could have been spoken? What moments could have been shared? Would he have ever made it back_ home_?

_ “So long you have lived, yet so much more you crave, G’raha Tia. So full and so empty.” _

He started at the voice and that sadness grew larger, dragging him back into the cold.

  
  
_ “So much brighter your soul is when it is not split into two…so much happier you will be when you return to me...even brighter.” _

Two? When did that happen? Did they mean the Tower took more of him than he thought? Or did they mean…?

  
  
_ “Breathe, G’raha Tia. Breathe and complete your story. Awaken!” _

Burning white light and a harsh pull ripped him from the darkness. He cried out in fear as the shards of memories impaled him, causing his aether to convulse violently and twist in knots. It was overwhelming, overflowing, and just as he felt he was about to tear apart, the pain faded and he whimpered into the void, afraid and alone.

  
  
~0~0~0~0~0~

G’raha leapt up and gasped for air, his vision blinded by blue hues and his muscles screaming at him in pain. Gods, he was so stiff, like he had slept on a hard floor.

  
  
_ Oh...wait… _

He_ was_ on a hard floor.   
  
Rubbing the tiredness and sensitivity from his eyes, he inhaled sharply, an all too familiar musky scent flooding his nostrils. He was in the Crystal Tower, but...this smell wasn’t how it had been when he was last in it. No, this was its smell when he first_ sealed _himself inside, or close to it. His eyes widened and he quickly took in his surroundings, memories hitting him hard like a fireball to the ribs. Not long ago, he had bid farewell to everyone, the last face he saw burning clear as day in his mind, clearer than it had been for decades. Books he had read before finally giving in to his decreed slumber were littered all over the azure tiles. He could recall reading them as if he had just done so but a fortnight ago.

G’raha held his head in his hands and he scanned his memories, shocked to find all experiences from the First still there as if they were yesterday, yet the exploration of the Crystal Tower felt the same, both time sequences wildly intense in his mind. It left him reeling, trying to piece together what had come first.  
  
It was then that he examined himself. No flowing robes covered him, but adventuring gear made with the finest leather and fabrics he could afford at the time. It felt bulky, awkward, comfortably, and familiar all at once. It was him and a him from long ago.

_ This is going to take some getting used to…. _

Wincing as he rose to his feet, he clumsily walked out of the chambers he awoke in, squinting as his eyes adjusted to the brilliant glow of one of the tower’s many halls. He glanced down to shield his vision when he realized he could see his reflection on the polished floor. He touched his face in awe as his young self stared back at him, bewildered and tired looking. No crystal, his tattoos showing openly, his hair lacking the deathly white tips, and his eyes glowing with a vibrancy he hadn’t seen in decades. Or he had...just a day or so ago it seems…  
  
“My head…” he complained before continuing his trek, joints protesting along the way. G’raha needed to know where he was. Of course he was in the Tower and clearly in the Source judging by his attire, but just where in the timeline he didn’t know for sure. How long had he been asleep? How long had his aether floated in the rift? How had time flowed there?  
  
The questions ate at him as he walked weakly to the entrance of the Tower, its doors clenched shut with the might of the Allag. Summoning his strength, he forced its seal to break and gasped as cool Eorzean evening wind swept through his hair, the smell overwhelmingly feeling like home. It brought him to his knees and tears trailed down his cheeks. He thanked whoever judged his soul and cast him back into the land of the living. He cursed himself for sleeping in such a way that he was so sore. He prayed that all on the First were safe and well.   
  
And for several minutes he wept, letting the emotion of all that had happened in his life seep out in a flood.   
  
For several minutes more, he just breathed.

~0~0~0~0~0~

G’raha wanted to do so much at the same time. He needed to locate the Warrior of Light. He was hungry. He should stop by the camp and see Rammbroes. He should have his body checked there before continuing. That was the wisest first choice, but his feet carried him beyond to Revenant's Toll. He had technically died, so everyone should have been sent back to the Source, including the Warrior. A glimmer of hope kept his feet moving despite his body shouting at him to rest. Why rest? He had been sleeping for gods know how long and he would get plenty of opportunity to rest once his frantic mind was quelled. He needed to know they were safe, that they were all in one piece.  
  
He wanted desperately to hug his hero.

He_ needed _to feel their warmth.

G’raha was aware the Scions had set up a base in the local town, making it his prime target to start his hunt. Panting as he hobbled, he wondered if the trail leading back to the Toll was always this exhausting. Perhaps he should have stopped at camp first to at least get a chocobo? He recalled it being very little for him to endure on his own before, but that was prior to his slumber and whatever else may be affecting him.

He still felt_ peculiar _inside. The only way to describe was like a vase had been shattered and fixed with parts from an identical container, but no pieces were missing. All were there and accounted for, belonging in a way and yet not, making a brand new shape that still worked. Simply put, G’raha Tia was_ whole_, but that wholeness came with all the cracks and glue that made transitioning piece to piece odd. Time would help him adjust, he was sure of that. However, that didn’t make how he felt now wasn’t off-putting.

He’d certainly take it over the cold.

The faint echoes of people conversing pricked his ears and he increased his pace, the archway now in sight. A shot of adrenaline pumped in his veins as a mixture of excitement and fear swelled in his heart. What if they weren’t there? Where would he go?

_ I’ll find them. They have to be somewhere on this star and I _ ** _will _**_find them. _

Revenant's Toll had always been busy even through the night, so the crowds didn’t surprise him. It fact, it was comforting to have all the noise to drown out his worry. Carefully, he scanned each head that passed by, ears pivoting to pick up any word on the Warrior or their companions. Disappointment grew as he walked, hearing all manner of gossip from the reconstruction efforts at Ishgard, to the upcoming festivities of the season, but none helpful. He furrowed his brows and stopped after his second trip around the markets.

Pulling out his courage, G’raha called out_ their _name, it coming out in a strangled tone that made him frown and flush as passerbys gave him odd looks. Coughing to clear his throat, he tried once more, his voice ringing over the people and making heads turn with curiosity, none the head he was looking for. No reply answered him and he huffed as he looked over the crowds.   
  
“Please, I beseech you.” he addressed them in his “Exarch” voice, “The Warrior of Light, I’m looking for the Champion of Eorzea. Has anyone seen them?”   
  
Whispers and silence fell among them and his heart sank.

“....Anyone? It is of the utmost importance I find them! Please?”

Without a single reply, all turned away and returned to their duties, causing his tail to twitch in agitation. Worry was starting to creep up in his throat, making him swallow hard before continuing his calls. He tried the names of the other Scions: Urianger, Thancred, Y’shtola, Alphinaud, and Alisaie. No response. His voice began to crack as panic set in, the Warrior’s name slipping out louder and louder from his lips as his ears and eyes darted back and forth for any sign of them.

“Hey! HEY! Mister Miqo’te!” a feminine voice yelled. His red eyes turned towards it and stopped on lavender haired lalafell in a pink tunic waving her arms in the air and running to him. “Mist-ah! Oh! I finally have your attention!” she exclaimed before stopping a few steps away from his legs. She took a moment to catch her breath and gave him a thorough look over before smiling. “You look like the wind-up Rammbroes gifted the Warrior. Pardon me for not knowing your name.”

“I’m the Crys-I mean...I am G’raha Tia.” G’raha corrected himself.

“Tataru! I’m the receptionist for the Scions of th- oh, never mind that. I heard you calling the names of my friends. Did you just say your name was G’raha?”  
  
“The Scions!” he gasped and dropped to his knees to look her directly in the eyes. “Have you heard any word of their current condition? Have they awoken?”

Tataru’s eyebrows raised and her expression changed to one of thoughtfulness then seriousness before she answered, “You best come with me. I’ll fetch us a spot of tea and my, you looked famished! I can make you something real quick before we talk." She warmly smiled as she beckoned him to follow her, her little legs marching with purpose towards the Rising Stones. "And I’m sure there will be plenty to talk about, Mister G’raha.”   
  
His belly growled at the offer of food and he sighed as some of the tension in his throat eased. Time was of the essence, but if anyone could lead him to the Warrior, Tataru was his best shot, presently. Her composure helped quell his swirling thoughts, thought the concern still remained of his dear friend and the Scions' fate upon his death on the First.  
  
_I will find them. _He repeated to himself, breathing slowly as if to exhale all the worry and anxiety from his being. _No matter what_,_ I will find them._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was way happier with this in my head, but I don't think it turned out too terribly. The next chapter will be from the WoL's POV directly after the prologue, so prepare your hearts <3 And I apologize for any hiccups be it grammar or spelling or what have you. I'm exhausted and it is 1am. Evenings are the only time I can write in peace ;;


	3. Mourn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How much more heartbreak can one hero bear before they break?

It was over.

After months of fighting, researching, hoping, and praying, it was_ over. _

The Warrior was frozen in place, their knees and shoulders aching as they held onto the crystallized body of what was their lover. It was a wishful position as if he would suddenly wake up and they’d carry him off to safety, kissing away the tears along the way and thanking the gods. The glistening drop now forever preserved streaming down G’raha’s face was almost as heart-wrenching as the look of hopelessness behind that haunting smile.

They had failed.

_ It was over. _

There was an explosive cocktail of emotions stirring in the Warrior of Darkness as they stared into his eyes, no longer the brilliant red, but solid, blank, blue orbs that showed no soul behind. Anger was certainly there, along with sadness, denial, defeat, emptiness...but there was another. _ Relief_. It churned their stomach at the thought. They’d give up everything and anything to have prevented this, yet they felt relieved? What right did they have to feel relief when they felt so broken when he was lost forever. 

_ He’s no longer in pain… _

He wouldn’t have been in pain if they had found another way. If only he hadn’t been speeding the process by trying to send all the scions back, trying to find a way to get Ryne over to the Source, and trying to find a way to get himself there, all while juggling his role as a leader and protector of the Crystarium. He wouldn’t have even been in the position to begin with had the Warrior not died in G’raha’s timeline.

_ But then I wouldn’t have met him again… _

It hurt too much. It cut too deep.

The Warrior dropped to their knees as reality continued to hit them, each added moment of realization and memory slamming an axe into their soul. It was but an hour ago that G’raha was smiling, singing, and telling tales to the party as they enjoyed a large picnic; a victory for all the work they had done to restore the First. Yes, the crystal had already visibly spread in the months the Warrior of Light had been there, but G’raha always played it off. He claimed it came in bursts and it would surely settle for another odd number of years, but Warrior called him out on it, demanding to know what was happening. Again, he smiled and smothered as much worry as he could, all under a cheery guise.  
  
_ “I made you a promise that I intend to keep. Alphinaud has yet to find another way, but I am so close to finding an answer. They deserve to be back home. To have happiness. I still have time. _ ** _We _**_still have time. Pray calm your worried mind, my friend.” _

  
It wasn’t long before wetness covered the Warrior’s cheeks, the emotion no longer containable as their soul split open. The strangled sob came out like an animal dying, begging to be taken out and they curled into the solid form in their arms, cradling him protectively, still refusing to let go.

“G-G’raha…! G’raha!” they cried out, arms shaking from the weight and from pure overload. They attempted to bury their face in his hair, to kiss and nuzzle his ears, only to met with hard, unmoving crystal. Inhaling, they tried desperately to find his scent, but all they could smell was the tower and its energies; a sharp tangy smell that crinkled their nose with its freshness. It made their face twist in disgust. It was an intruder. It didn’t belong. It was sickening.

  
Suddenly, the Warrior felt a small hand on their back and they shot up, coming face to face with Ryne, her eyes bright red, cheeks stained with tears, and her lips contorted into a pained frown. It’s then, they noticed the Scions were gone. Uriange, Y’shtola, Thancred, Alphinaud, and Alisaie were nowhere to be found.  
  
“Th-They got sent back...I think? He’s...he’s not with us anymore....” she said weakly with a sniff, almost as if scared to speak. “...You’re still here...”  
  
There was a long pause as the Warrior of Light pondered that thought. He couldn’t have intended for this, could he? The Exarch had seemed just as shocked that his body was being overrun...it couldn’t have been his intended solution...  
  
But he had lied before to stop them from protecting him.

Anger. 

So much anger.

“Give...him...back...” they whispered through gritted teeth as a cool breeze swept through, making the water on their face burn once more.  
  
“What?”  
  
The Warrior rose to their feet, sharp short breaths coming from their nostrils as they turned to face the tower, sparkling in the distance, “GIVE HIM BACK! GODS DAMN YOU!”

The young girl gasped and tried to soothe the raging Warrior the best she could, tears welling in her eyes again as she trembled. “He can’t come back! He’s gone! Please...!” she shouted, panic clear in her tone.  
  
They should have been more sympathetic, calmer. Thancred, her new family, was gone from her life too, but she had the comfort of knowing they were still alive somewhere even if out of reach. Was that what was keeping her strong now, trying to quell them the best she could?

“Please...my friend…”

  
_ ...my friend. _

“Don’t call me that!” the shortness of their words was not what they intended and they regretted it immediately as they saw Ryne jump back, helpless and afraid. She couldn’t hear G’raha’s dying words echoing in their mind. She likely didn’t know just how important those words were to them. They were G’raha’s...they belonged to his lips, his voice.  
  
The voice they’d never hear again. Not like it was.

Ryne appeared to have some form of understanding as she summoned her courage to speak once more, “I’m so sorry...I never wanted it to come to this...I should have been able to help more, to find a way.” her voice was cracking, her guilt as strong as the Warrior’s own.

The Warrior’s head dropped and they shook their head, trying to subdue the torment within. “There was nothing more you could have done.” they tried their best to comfort her, despite the bitterness in their throat, “…he had his mind set...he-”

_ He was a lovable, hopeless fool. _

Ryne let out a shaky breath as she averted her gaze, mind racing with the hope of solution. “But...he still yet exists in your home, does he not?” she offered, trying to find anything to soften the blow. “He’s not truly gone, then! You should find him.”

The Warrior had forgotten she had been told.

The suggestion stung, their heart aching with a hope that they knew was pointless. Her innocent gaze had all the purest intentions in the First and that’s what made it worse. It was true. There on the Source, his younger self stay locked away in the tower, awaiting the future they had promised him, basically at arms reach. But…  
  
“That’s not G’raha…”

The young lass furrowed her eyebrows and opened her mouth to speak, but no words followed. She searched the Warrior’s face for any clue, for a why, too timid to ask herself.

Squeezing the body in their arms possessively, they emphasized, “That’s...not _ my _ G’raha.” Realization dawned on Ryne and she gave a look of pity that irked and lulled them, but all that mattered was she understood. Taking a step back, she held her hand over her heart and sniffled one last time before running towards the sanctuary, likely to find Lyna. The Warrior couldn't comprehend talking to her now. Explaining the truth of what happened, arguing, hearing her mourn, knowing they had broken their promise to her to keep the Exarch safe...they couldn’t do it. Not so soon after.

With weak legs, the Warrior turned their back to the Tower, to the Crystarium and all its people that relied on the Exarch, to confrontation, to the wailing crowds, and walked away from it all, keeping G’raha in their arms every step.

  
~0~0~0~0~0~

_ “I wish...I wish to live back on the Source with you.” _   
  
_ “But-” the Warrior jumped as a crystalline finger shushed them, G’raha’s ruby eyes lovingly gazing into theirs. _   
_  
“However,” he continued, “I know that cannot be as much as I desire it. So, I have considered all the places I’d like to travel with you here. Mayhap when you are free and I can slip away for a while, we could go exploring? Our own adventure for two. I’d very much like that if you'll indulge me.”_

_ The Warrior’s face softened and they kissed the miqo’te’s forehead, “If that is what you would like, we can start planning after the next week or so. Our work in the Empty should be well done by that time.” _

_ G’raha’s ears wiggled joyfully and the Warrior was quick to kiss them before they stopped, making their lover gasp and cling to them tightly with a smile. Voice muffled against an ear, the Warrior asked, “What’s top the top of the list?” _

_ “Mmm...I’d very much like to visit Lyhe Ghiah if the Fairy King would be so kind as to allow.” _

  
~0~0~0~0~0~

The Warrior’s footsteps and pants echoed in the grand throne room as they hobbled inside. Walking from Lakeland to Il Mheg was no easy feat, especially with such precious and_ heavy _cargo in tow. As they had trekked, numbness took hold of them that helped carry the burden, the crystal nearly doubling the weight G’raha had been before the full transformation happened. Despite this, their shoulders still felt as if they would pop out, muscles screaming for relief, but they would not let him go until they reached the exact location. They had promised.  
  
Word had reached through most of Lakeland now that the Exarch had died and the Warrior of Darkness had left with his corpse. Several travelers had passed, gasping and whispering as the Warrior marched on, eyes locked towards the direction of the castle. They refused to stop, refused to let anyone take more than a glance at the crystal in their arms, and refused to answer questions. There would be enough of that upon their return to the Crystarium, though they planned to postpone that for as long as possible. Many side routes were taken to avoid search parties and once Il Mheg was reached, the pixies left to have their fun with the searchers, making the rest of the journey far quieter.

It pained them that he looked beautiful, reflecting the setting sunlight in a dazzling way that made speckles of light follow them wherever they went. If he had passed with a more peaceful face, they might have managed looking at him without a knife being sliced through their heart. 

_ “...live…” _

That simple word plagued their mind with every step and would continue to do so if they could find the will to carry on. It hadn’t been an order or a request. It was a_ plea_. A plea that the Warrior had wished for him as well with every fiber of their being.

To live.  
  
To not be trapped in an eternity of crystal.

To live_ together _…

Their knees finally buckled and gave out as they reached the center of the room, the hills and stairs that were climbed before taking their toll. Crying out as the weight of the crystal slammed into their lap, they carefully held G’raha to prevent him from slipping into the floor regardless of the pain. Heavens forbid he crack. Heavens forbid he shatter. Gingerly, they adjusted themselves so part of him rested on the glass tiles while the rest was cradled against their body. He was so cold still, almost as cold as the floor.

“We’re here…” they said, their voice cracking as anguish made itself known once more, the numbness fading and the aches rolling in. Biting their lip to hold back a whimper, they let a shaky hand stroke G’raha’s cheek and imagined him whole, grinning and looking at his surroundings. He would be asking questions, wide-eyed, wanting to know every detail of their battle here, and what happened when.

Obliging to the imaginary request, the Warrior began aloud, “U-um...this is where I fought Titania…”

Was this alright to do? Had they gone mad? What would the others think if they saw them now?  
  
“It was...it was a difficult fight. Tricks and elemental magicks, even ents that grew ten times their size.” It became easier to speak as they lost themselves in the story, pretending with all their might that G’raha was there, listening and taking notes. If only they could hide in that illusion forever. If only it wasn’t a heartbroken fool’s daydream.

“Twelve, they hit like a...well like as hard as you’d think a living tree the size of a building could hit. They made the whole place smell lovely though, like a nice stroll through the Shroud.”

_ “I remember watching you fight in the Shroud, though I must apologize for those circumstances.” _

The Warrior sharply inhaled and held back a tear as imaginary G’raha replied, soft voice washing over them like a summer breeze.

“Don’t apologize.” they remarked, chuckling to themselves, “I did find humor it in later. Orneriness aside, I’m glad we could meet in such a way. Made quite the impression.”  
  
_ “I am forever grateful that you look back at those times fondly. Pray, continue with the tale?” _

And so the Warrior did. 

They carried on as if everything was normal, retelling in great detail of the journey to the castle all the way until the Lightwarden was defeated as the sun fully set, leaving them only illuminated by the magic of the fae. Several times they lost their composure, reality dumping on them like cold water every time they looked at his face. The Warrior eventually found their gaze settling on his right arm as it made it easier to forget the rest of him wasn’t of flesh, their thumb lovingly running over it in the way G’raha liked and often mimicked.

_ He’s fallen asleep, _ they convinced themselves as they rocked back and forth in the silence, G’raha’s made up responses no longer coming to them. _ He’s fallen asleep and will wake up in a few hours. _

Out of energy, out of stories, out of willpower to continue the farse, and out of tears to shed, the Warrior whimpered and shifted to their side, spooning G’raha’s body and pressing their forehead against his solid back, missing the gentle movement of his breathing and the warmth he gave to them many nights. They had taken those sweet moments for granted, far too eager to fall into sleep and not savor the calm, the togetherness. What they wouldn’t give to have one last night.

What they wouldn't give to have themselves flung into the rift to be with him once more...

“My precious sapling mourns yet again.” a friendly tongue spoke quietly, yet voice echoing in the large room. The Warrior didn’t flinch as a blinding orb of light swirled around the perimeter of the room, fae magic charging in the air. Instead, they squeezed their arms around the crystal body and frowned, denying the pixie a response.

Feo Ul unfolded themselves from the light, wings stretching out to fill much of the empty space in the chambers in all their glory as King. “Not once, but thrice you have now lost him. This time, however, your pretty soul dims with defeat. Absolutely hopeless.”  
  
“Leave me.” the Warrior snapped and closed their eyes, hiding away from the light Feo Ul stirred in the room.  
  
The fae sighed and floated down to the floor, placing their legs to the side to lounge in a manner one would suspect of boredom. “You wallow and lay when there is still more to the play. The Source awaits with the rest of your fate.”  
  
“I’m not going back.” The retort was quick and stern.

“Did I sound like I was suggesting?!” the King raised their voice with an agitated undertone, “You cling to that lifeless thing when_ he _is waiting for you! So much wasted time and doing nothing fun!”

The Warrior’s eyebrows knitted as they raised up, meeting the pixie’s eyes. “Who’s _ he _ ?”  
  
“Who indeed!” Feo Ul’s face lit up now that they had their sapling’s attention and rose back into the air, spinning and twirling as they went on. The stained glass of the room shimmered with her light as the pixie danced, blue and green hues flying passed the Warrior's vision. “Your dwarf friend called on me to get you. 'Of the utmost importance' that you_ see him_. Oooh! I just know my darling sapling’s sadness will all melt away like old snow in spring! I expect a party! And games! A full celebration w-”

“Feo Ul!” the Warrior interrupted, eyes showing a hint of worry and a knot in their throat, “Who is_ he_? Tell me.”

Feo Ul smirked and stopped in front of them, the colors freezing in place eerily as they tilted themselves down. Face to face with the Warrior the fae was, pupils glistening with knowledge not yet known to the sapling. The Warrior swallowed down the knot and squeezed G'raha's crystal hand, a sense of dread rising within them.

_Have I not suffered enough?_

“What fun is a story..." Feo Ul brought a slender finger to their lips and grinned wickedly, voice bubbling with delight, "...if we spoil the ending~? Hurry now, before you miss your cue~”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I struggled with this chapter immensely, which I wasn't expecting to, but here we are. I started it and scrapped it. Then, I wrote a good 800 words, then scrapped that and started from scratch. My original plan really fell through and felt like it was poorly done filler, so I decided to redo it, keep it simple, and this is the result.
> 
> This is a big reason I don't do chaptered stories for my non original works lol. And why I also don't do angst very often.
> 
> I have re-edited this chapter with the proper pronouns for Feo Ul so hopefully I didn't miss any xx;;
> 
> The next chapter is planned to be almost entirely from G'raha's point of view and it's the chapter I have been looking forward to the most since I started this.
> 
> Please don't worry about Ryne <3 She's a big girl and you haven't seen the last of her.


	4. Longing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
> 
> And grow heavier.

G’raha paced anxiously as he ate the last of his sandwich, the food sinking to the bottom of his stomach in a way he found unpleasant. The Scions would be here at any moment and he was far from ready. They would want to talk, want explanations, have questions, and he had little clue about where to start. His mind debated whether they would be overjoyed or angered to see him, knowing all they had invested in the First and how swiftly their plans were ended because of him. True, the goal was to get back to the Source, but would they approve of it being so abrupt? How it happened?  
  
Their bonds had only strengthened since the reveal of his identity and his truth had been laid out for all to see, but he may have undone that all by yet again hiding another secret from them. Not even Urianger had been trusted with the information of his experiments. He had successfully kept them from suspecting anything until three months in when the Warrior had noticed that the crystal was spreading across his torso. G’raha deflected and feigned an experienced calmness while his insides twisted, worry clawing in the back of his head. 

Repeatedly, he had failed, each attempted causing his curse to spread bit by bit. The more he strained to try, the more the crystal grew, but he didn’t cease. The struggle of seeing the Scions search every day for a way home wore him as hard as Ryne confiding in him that she was scared to be without them and wished to travel to the Source. He did wish to help them and see to that his wrongs were corrected. He had to. He had promised. However, deep down it was all a selfish reason that he had continued every night while the Warrior was lost in sleep. 

_ He _wanted to be back on the Source. 

And now that he had it, he felt_ guilty_.

Lyna had never known his intentions. She never even knew the truth of his past. Thoughts of her mourning his death tormented him, stirring several regrets in his mind. He knew how swiftly her parents were taken from her and she had lost him once before. Now, he had done it again without so much as a goodbye. 

The Warrior could tell her once things settled and were explained. Maybe Feo Ul could help them stay in contact with letters? Lyna would finally know the truth after all these years...could she handle it? Would she hate him for it? 

And the people of the Crystarium that had relied on him for so long now we’re on their own. He trusted them to survive and thrive, but it was unfair to throw them in that position unprepared. Before, he had taken precautions and arranged all he could to assure they would be fine without him, but now he wasn’t sure if what he did then was enough for_ now_.

Ryne.

Poor Ryne.

Still so young and finally having found a family to call her own. He had to find a way to get her to the Source. He was a mystel…no..._ miqo’te _of his word. The rift was no longer an enigma to him. He would find a way, even if it-

_ ...began the cycle again. _

That thought was shoved away harshly and grasped at his right arm, sighing in relief as warmth and muscle greeted him. Such extremes would be reserved for when all other paths were trodden and he prayed it would never come to fruition. He had far more knowledge than he had then and he was going to use that to his advantage.  
  
“Are you still hungry, Mr. G’raha?”  
  
Broken out of his anxiety-induced trance, G’raha eased and looked down at Tataru, who had another tray of tea and small sandwiches made up. A warm smile spread across his face and he knelt to take the tray from her.  
  
“You are far too kind. Mayhaps, you would sit with me and share?” he requested, earning him a friendly grin in return and a giddy shuffle towards the nearby table. 

“Oh, don’t mind if I do! I did bring an extra cup after all! Long day it’s been for the both of us.” Tataru said as she hopped up onto the chair and waited for him to join. “Tell me, how are you faring? Our friends will be here shortly and you seem more nervous than a cactuar surrounded by weavers.  
  


G’raha could feel his ears drooping at the comment and cleared his throat to compose himself. “A-Ah...yes. If I may be honest-”  
  
“And you may.” Tataru interrupted in a chipper voice as she poured him a cup. He chuckled lightly and flushed at her hospitality, still feeling it was undeserved.

“Well...I’m not sure everyone will welcome me as warmly as you have. I have made a mess of things…” He took the cup and saucer into his hands and held it carefully, his eyes focusing on the steam as he lost himself in another moment of thought. Everyone had something to lose by leaving. Would what they lost be worth coming back and him along with them? 

Tataru tsked loudly as she grabbed a cucumber sandwich and her cup, breaking him from his trance. Looking up at her, he realized she was_ dipping _her sandwich in her tea and he furrowed his brows questioningly at her. She took a bite of the soggy bread before continuing, oblivious to his staring, “Everything you did was with good reason. You saved us all from another calamity and you have brought everyone back, save the Warrior themselves...though I still don’t understand just why they didn’t return with you.”  
  
He watched her eat for a moment and debated trying it himself, but the knot in his belly urged him against it, so he settled to sip the tea alone. “They can freely pass between the two realms so my death didn’t_ release _them from anything. Their lack of being here is entirely of their will.”  
  
“Which is why we sent the little friend to get them.”

“Correct. They should be here any moment, I would assume. Mayhaps sooner than the Scions.” G’raha felt his heart quicken at the thought and subconsciously ran his free hand through his hair to straighten it, cringing slightly at the oiliness of it. He then became painfully self-conscious of the clothes he was wearing and contemplated asking for something more...fresh. How long had Tataru said he had been sealed away? Perhaps a full shower was in order. Did he have the time? He very much would like the time.  
  
The lalafell grabbed another sandwich, continuing her ritual as before and oblivious to G’raha’s curious staring, “Still, don’t you worry your little head! They all sounded very surprised over the linkshell, but not_ angry_. Confused for certain”  
  
“Understandable, all things considering.”  
  
“Yes...Oh! Speaking of linkshell, I’m having a pearl made for you so you can keep in touch with us all. It’ll be ready after they all get here, but best to first talk in person.” she replied with a nod and licked a bit of crumb off her thumb. His eyebrows rose in understanding and he nodded before bringing the cup to his mouth, drinking faster than he had intended to. 

_ Curse these nerves. _

With a sigh, he placed his tea back onto the table with a shaky hand, causing Tataru to look up at him with concern in her eyes. “Things will be just fine,” she reassured, reaching over with her whole body to gently place her hand on top of his. “And if that isn’t enough to ease you, I have your back.” 

The remark and her grin sent a wave of nostalgia through him and for a split second, he swore he saw a yellow eared cloak around Tataru. It was gone with a blink and G’raha stared at the lalafell dumbfounded before returning her comforting expression with a smile. “Thank you. I appreciate-“

The door flinging open startled the both of them as a tall elezen G’raha didn’t know barged into the room, looking winded. “The...hah...the Scions are...hah...here!” He wheezed and saluted, making G’raha jump out of his chair and start breathing just as heavily. His heart was beating against his ribs so harshly, he could feel it in his throat and he swallowed down the sensation as his body started to tremble. He was suffocating in worry. 

_ They’re going to be angry. They will turn me away and want nothing to do with me. I don’t deserve their kindness. I- _

Tataru was saying something that his mind wasn’t registering, likely comforting words judging by the pitch, as he fidgeted with his hands and his tail tucked between his legs like a kit about to be punished. He desperately wanted to crawl into a corner and hide.

Familiar faces trickled into view and all of the Source slowed as G’raha looked at each and every one, accessing their emotions and preparing for whatever should come. He could feel his ears droop as shocked eyes took him in and left him uncertain in their meaning.

“Is it truly you?” Alphinaud broke the silence first as he took a cautious step forward. 

“His aether…” Y’shtola began with eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “It is the same, but brighter? More? ...More of the same, but yet differences. It’s stitched together.”

“Stitched?” Alisaie joined, her hand coming to her chin in thought. “Like a quilt?”

“Pray, tell us thy last memory!” Urianger’s request was rushed and full of hope. Thancred nodded in agreement and looked at the miqo’te in expectancy, but a skepticism G’raha understood. G’raha then jumped at a warm hand on his leg and he glanced down to meet Tataru’s eyes, her peace stirring his resolve and he felt some of the tension in his body melt.

“They’ll understand. Say it just like you told me.”

Hesitation lasted until he couldn’t bear to keep it in any longer, guilt ripping him apart from the inside. The words spilled from his mouth like a river breaking down a dam and he let out his frustration, regret, happiness, and sorrow. Apologies and promises to fix what his actions caused trailed immediately after, his head down to show his sincerity and to avoid their gazes. 

He would have continued speaking for longer had Thancred’s arms not embraced him so suddenly, followed by the hands and arms of the others squeezing him tightly in a way that felt like it had been an eternity since he was last held. Tears flowed as his knees gave out, and the others worked together kept his body upright. Even Tataru who was tangled amongst legs and clinging to his knee. 

As the tears slowed down, G’raha’s mind reminded him once more of how terribly he needed to bathe and he mentally apologized to all the Scions for any offense he may have caused. None said a word except for joyful remarks at his survival, which was more than he ever felt he deserved.

He had to repay their kindness somehow. And he’d start as soon as his Warrior came home.

~0~0~0~0~

The Warrior barely stepped out of the castle before Lyna and several Crystarium guards rushed forward. Word had gotten around despite their best efforts. Surely some passerby had realized where the Warrior was headed with the Exarch’s body. If not that, then one of the fae had told.

Lyna did not look angry nor did she look upset. She only appeared numb. The slightest hint of puffiness was visible around her eyes from past tears shed, but her pupils were stone cold as she took the briefest of glances at the crystal in the Warrior’s arms and ordered, “It is him. Everyone take hold and help get him home.”

_ If only he could be_**_home_ ** _ . _

The Warrior almost didn’t trust the guards to carry him, but their aching body was screaming for the burden to be lifted. Sniffs and saddened sighs slipped from the bunch as each took a limb and supported his back. Gingerly, he was risen onto their shoulders and the trek back to the Crystarium began. 

_ Like carrying a casket. _

The thought made the Warrior’s stomach churn and they averted their gaze to the ground, their mind desperately replaying memories of him alive. Anything to not think of all the crystal, even if it hurt to remember.

They settled on a memory of G’raha laughing heartily as they flung harmless water spells at each other on a walk through Lakeland. A smile crept onto their lips as the image of a very confused guard wondering why they were so soaked upon their return lifted their heart and for a breath, they felt like G’raha was waiting for them at the Ocular. They felt they could rush up the stairs and he’d be there, wide grin and eyes loving. They wanted to. Needed to.

But he wasn’t there anymore.

What remained of him was in front of them, lifeless and solid, carefully carried by the guards with Lyna’s unwavering gaze keeping watch.

The barest whimper escaped their lips as they hid their face and cried silently as they walked. No one asked what happened. No one asked if they were okay. No one spared a glance besides an alert ear pivot from Lyna. 

_ Do they blame me for this? Or do they have that much pity? I do not know which I prefer. _

In all actuality, they were unsure how best to comfort the Warrior and felt lost without the Exarch to guide them. The guards glanced at Lyna who closed her eyes and shook her head, not wishing to stir a greater reaction from the hero just yet.

She couldn’t handle it now and she wasn’t sure she could handle it later.

~0~0~0~0~

The Crystarium was eerily quiet. Shock and disbelief had overtaken the settlement once the Exarch’s body had returned and the Warrior of Darkness with it. The Warrior did not make eye contact with anyone. They refused to answer inquiries as to what occurred. Ryne surely had told the masses what happened. Why did they need to hear it again? Why did they want the Warrior to relive it_ again_?

Lyna had already begun arrangements to let the people mourn properly with a funeral and the Warrior wanted nothing of it. As soon as the body was safely placed in the Ocular, the Warrior slipped away to the Pendants to hide away from all the commotion, all the talk of death, and all the reminders of him.  
  
How they_ failed _him.  
  
Going back to their room was a mistake, however. Immediately, they were bombarded with memories and the itch in the back of their mind that G’raha would visit soon now they were here. They swore they could sense his gaze on them through one of his scrying portals.

  
  
_ I should get ready for him. _

It was instinctual at this point to expect him over. Within thirty minutes they would hear a knock and he’d be all smiles and have his arms loaded up with a bag filled with fresh foods to prepare a meal.  
  
The Warrior’s eyes went wide as they darted towards the table, hands trembling as they caught sight of the cake he had been working on earlier that day. A white cake with berry frosting G’raha had remade over and over again to get it perfect like he remembered having on the Source. It took him two weeks. They were going to share it after the picnic. 

They were going to do so much together.

A chair flew through the air and smashed into the wall with a loud crash and the Warrior cried out before turning their frustrations at the other furnishings around the room. It all hurt too much. It all reminded them of him. 

_ “I had everything made for your arrival and stay.” _

One by one each lower cabinet door was kicked in as a specter of the Exarch loomed nearby.

_ “Is it all to your liking?” _

They could see his pleased smile as they punched in a crate of food and hot tears poured from their eyes.

_ “Is...Is it rude to ask if I may stay till morning? I wish to not be alone tonight. I apologize for my selfishness-” _

One, two, three planters tumbled to the floor, dirt and the fruits on the plants scattering all around the Warrior’s feet. They grabbed a fourth and flung it towards the bench G’raha always sat at, its metal framing bending at the impact and the purple cushions dirtied with soil.

_ “Pray, let us stay like this just for a little longer…” _

The apparition wrapped his arms around their body and they sobbed before breaking free of it, marching towards the dresser.

_ “You look stunning today~ As you do every day, my hero.” _

The mirror on the dresser shattered as the Warrior’s fist made contact, shards slicing through their skin, and a shout of pain crawling out of their throat. Whether it was from the injury, the loss, or a mix of the two, the Warrior couldn’t tell.

“Please come back…” they whispered vainly to whoever would listen as they dropped to their knees, clutching their hand, “...don’t go.”

_ “I’m sorry my duties have me so preoccupied. I can stop by tonight if you don’t mind?” _

Their eyes fell on the bed, currently unharmed save a few pieces of dirt that had flung from one of the plants. Just that morning he was curled up in their arms and playing with a lock of their hair. He was smiling. He was happy. They were happy.

The illusion tormenting them appeared sprawled overtop the blankets, resting on his side and grinning sweetly at them.

_ “I love you...I adore you…” _

Weakly, they hobbled to the bed and fell onto it, causing the Exarch to vanish, much to their dismay. Wiping away tears and sniffling, they reached for the pillow and held it close before inhaling. His scent was still there. He was still there. Just for a little while longer.

The Warrior kissed the pillow and closed their eyes, letting the exhaustion take them away from this world and prayed they would awaken from this nightmare. Or not awaken at all.

~0~0~0~0~

“G’raha? Are you here? Oh! You look really good!”  
  
The miqo’te jumped at the sudden voice and dropped his cane as he lost his focus. What small inkling of magic he had tried to conjured faded and he sighed in defeat, but quickly regained a friendly aura to keep the young elezen for feeling off-put by his arrival.

“I was not expecting you so soon!” G’raha remarked with a smile as he dipped to grab the cane, the sleeves of his new blue robes sliding across the tile floor, “I was just...well, trying to see if I could manage anything.”

He could feel it there like a word on the tip of his tongue, but yet at the same time it felt so far away and foreign. It was infuriating.  
  
Alphinaud gave a sympathetic nod. “You ought to travel to Gridania and talk to the conjurers there. Or perhaps you’d be willing to give arcanism a try?” he replied with a playful grin as he patted the codex on his hip. G’raha huffed in amusement as he rolled up his sleeves and held his hand out in a request to see the book, to which Alphinaud happily obliged.

“Arcanism seems far too technical for me. So many geometric patterns and equations. How do you even read this?” G’raha retorted as he flipped through the pages with furrowed brows.

“Ah well, you get used to it. And yes, while it is very technical, it relies heavily on strategy. That’s something you are familiar with.”  
  
“You also have to deal with summons...”

“Yes?”  
  
G’raha’s nose curled as he remembered a particularly bitter memory and handed the tome back, “Let’s just say they and I are not a good mix. Ah! Besides my already known history with the Scions, that is...which...truly I should have considered before...”

Alphinaud looked at G’raha quizzically as he latched the codex back to his belt, but was prevented from asking further questions with a raised hand and a bemused chuckle.

“I shall tell you the story another day. First, pray tell me has the Warrior of Light returned? And what of the recent developments in the Empire?” G’raha’s voice had hope laced in it, though he knew it was likely in vain as he had been waiting at the Tower for four days now with no sign of his hero. He only left the spot for food, shelter, sleep, or to relieve himself when needed.

All were things he had to get used to needing again, save shelter. What food and drink he partook as the Crystal Exarch was more out of politeness than necessity, though he did still enjoy tea from time to time. Anything he ingested was broken down in a way that the Tower took it from him as pure aether. It was this bond that also kept G’raha from ever needing sleep, though many days his body still ached for it. Now, he had no choice in these matters and they were all needed for his survival.

_ But I’m alive. I’m free. I’m here. _

“No sign of our friend, I’m sorry to report. I hope they don’t keep us waiting any longer.” Alphinaud replied with a frown.

Four days it had been on the Source since G’raha sent the message with Feo Ul for the Warrior to return. Seven days since the Scions returned the Source themselves. G’raha lamented that he could not sense the flow of time beyond the rift anymore, despite his best efforts to convince the Tower to allow him. He and it were no longer connected as they had been. A peculiar feeling to say the least after a century of being one in the same. He had hoped as its keeper, it would be more willing to aid in his desires, but much like his first few months learning to harness its power, it was a fickle mistress.

All he could do was hope not too much time had already passed between the Stars.

G’raha sighed before attempting to crossing his arms, grumbling as the sleeves fell back down his arms.

“And of the Empire?”

“Still stirring doubt in the people’s hearts about our abilities.” the elezen lad’s frown deepened as he continued, “The rumors spreading of the Warrior of Light especially are not flattering and with them being gone for as long as they have been…”

“They will return soon enough and light the beacons of hope once more.” the confidence in G’raha’s voice made Alphinaud’s expression relax and he nodded in agreement. “The best we can do for them now is to undermine what smear campaigns we can.”  
  
“Already begun! There is to be a big speech in Ul’dah from the leaders of the Alliance as well as some much-needed travel and aid supplied to those in need. Granted, it would have far more impact if the Warrior wa-”

“They’ll be here. They always are when needed most.”  
  
The interruption made Alphinaud take a long look at the miqo’te whose soft expression with the words spoke volumes of he and the Warrior’s affections. Alphinaud gave a knowing smile that made G’raha blush in realization and shyly turn his gaze to a nearby wall. A small chuckle escaped Alphinaud and he gently patted G’raha’s shoulder.

“That they are. Why don’t you take a break from practicing and come with me on a stroll? We’ve seen little of you since we reunited. Get some fresh air?”

“Thank you kindly for the invitation, but I must stay.” G’raha felt his cheek burn hotter as Alphinaud’s arms crossed and he coyly smiled. “...Just in case.”

“I pray to the Twelve that I find one as dedicated as you. Our friend is lucky.”

G’raha nervously laughed at the remark and readied the cane in front of him as he prepared to connect himself to the elements once more. 

_ No...if anyone is lucky, it is I. _

~0~0~0~0~

Lyna and the Warrior stood side by side as they acknowledged each mourner. Slowly and in single file, citizens of the Crystarium climbed the steps to the entrance of the Crystal Tower where an alter had been placed. The Exarch’s body was gently positioned lying down on it with one of his spare robes on top of him and his staff beside him as if to give the illusion he was merely resting. A glittering crystal hand was all that peeked out from the coverings which many gingerly held or kissed tearfully as they said their goodbyes. The Warrior could barely see the alter anymore as more and more flowers were placed around G’raha’s- 

_ Corpse. _

The Warrior swallowed hard as they shoved the intrusive thought away and wiped their nose. Their eyes were hurting as were their cheeks from feigning a smile to each individual that greeted them. They were trying to be strong. Trying to not seem broken and weak. Trying to not seem lost.

_ But I am. _

“That was the last one.” Lyna spoke in an exhausted tone and broke the Warrior free of their thoughts, “Are you sure you will not join us for the candlelight vigil? The sun will soon be set and-”  
  
She stopped as she watched the Warrior shake their head fiercely with a scowl. With a sigh, she look out amongst the crowds, the cries of sorrow ringing in her ears that made her heart sink deeper into the darkness. Blinking away the tears, she settled her eyes on young Ryne who was standing alone near the Aetheryte, head down and hands together in front of her. 

“_ She _ needs you...hero.”

The comment made the Warrior lift their eyes to the young girl and guilt swelled in their chest as her shoulders bobbed and trembled. They had not spoken to Ryne since they parted ways after G’raha’s death. They didn’t want to--they couldn’t--let her become their emotional striking dummy once more, but they couldn’t with a good heart leave things as they were between them.  
  
Or leave her alone and helpless.

They shouldn’t have to begin with.  
  
“_He _would want you there too,” Lyna said sadly, her hand reaching for the Exarch’s and gently sliding her fingertips across his palm. “Please...reconsider.”

Those words were enough to stir the Warrior’s resolve to the point that they inhaled and descended down the steps, grabbing a candlestick along the way and heading towards the aetheryte with all eyes watching.

~0~0~0~0~0~

“You need to go home.” Ryne insisted as she squeezed the Warrior’s hand. “The others are probably worried sick about you.”

The Warrior sighed and leaned back against the crystal wall of the Ocular, their legs shifting so they were sprawled out on the floor. They imagined they looked very much like a drunk right now. 

_ I could use another drink. _

Ryne rested her cheek on her knees as she kept her eyes locked onto their face, hoping for any reaction that spoke favorably to her request. The Warrior had been sitting on the floor for long enough that the cold from the floor seemed to be the same temperature as their own body. Try as they might, they couldn’t recall how they got here, only the booze from the night before and the concerned face of the bartender as he forced them to stop. 

_ My head hurts… _

Ryne continued talking, pausing every few sentences to see if the Warrior was still listening. Most of it fell on deaf ears as the Warrior’s gaze fixated on the ceiling.  
  
“You can’t just keep running away! First, it was hiding away in your room. Then, no one saw you for weeks and you come back bloodied and dirty-”  
  
“I was hunting.”  
  
“And now….please, my-” Ryne caught the word in her throat as the Warrior’s eyes snapped to her, pained expression in them. “ _ Please. _ I hate seeing you like this. This isn’t you. This isn’t the Warrior of Darkness I know.” The light hum of the Tower’s aether filled the silence as she awaited their response, brows knitted together in concern.

“What awaits me there-”  
  
“You don’t want to face it. You’re scared and still hurting. He can’t be replaced.” she was repeating all the excuses they had told her before, each cutting into them like a dagger. They inhaled sharply and swallowed hard, their eyes finally softening and giving Ryne full attention.

She was tearing up now and they felt terrible for it. They were terrible for making her lift them up. They should be stronger; should be the Warrior she looked up to. Be the hero G’raha looked up to.

“He...” the Warrior began, voice cracking and lips trembling.

  
  
_ “My hero ...my inspiration!” _

“He wouldn’t want me like this...would he...”

For the first time in nearly a month, they saw Ryne smile as relief washed over her like a wave. They could feel it too, though it was more like a fog being swept away with a breeze. The mugginess was still there and the pain, but finally the Warrior felt like they had a moment of clarity. A calm before a storm.

“Go.” the young girl said with a cheerful smile. “I’ll be fine here. And tell Thancred and the others I’m okay and not to worry.”

_ But he'll be there. _

The Warrior nodded and pulled her into a hug, trembling as they exhaled and kissed the top of her strawberry blonde head. In return she squeezed them tight and buried her face into their shoulder, which muffled her voice as she whispered, "You're going to be okay."

_ Would I be? _

"I'm so sorry."

Ryne pulled away from the hug and looked at the Warrior with light amusement, "To quote Thancred, 'You're going to be sorry if you don't hurry'!"

And with that, the Warrior rose to their feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...as I worked more on this chapter, I realized I was over 6.5k words and it really needed to be broken up. I apologize for the long wait as I have been VERY distracted leveling my G'rahas in game (come say hi to G'raha T'ia on Siren or G'raha T'ia on Odin~ and I totally don't also have a sin eater g'raha called Forgiven Longing on Goblin or a Kwehstal Exarch on Jenova that is just G'raha with a chocobo head.)
> 
> (I don't have a problem)
> 
> Moreso, however, I have been heavily invested in a certain someone's newest works *cough* sandorara and her Dumpling Chronicles *cough*
> 
> *COUGH COUGH* GO READ THEM *COUGH COUGH*
> 
> Anyways, most of the next chapter is written as is a large hunk of the final chapter that wraps everything up. So fingers crossed that I get them out swiftly x_x
> 
> Thank you for reading and for your lovely comments <3 I read every one and appreciate all the kind words that have encouraged me to keep writing.
> 
> (and I apologize for any spelling or grammatical issues. I tried to find them all, but it is 1:30am and I'll probably find more in the morning to fix)


	5. Embrace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We were one with our destinies entwined.

G’raha’s heart was racing as his feet pounded against the ground at a pace he hadn’t ran in years, no, a century. The moon above and the crystals around lit his was as he sprinted to the campsite in giddy excitement.

Not but a few moments ago, he had been sleeping soundly when the linkpearl in his ear started him from a pleasant dream. 

_ “They’re back!” Thancred had excitedly proclaimed over the pearl sending a rush of adrenaline strong enough to kill a man through G’raha’s every vein. “Quickly, to the Rising Sands! I shouldn’t have to say it twice!” _

Rammbroes was unsurprisingly awake at this hour and looked at his friend in confusion and then amusement as he charged towards him. Before he could ask what G’raha was doing, the miqo’te cried out, “They’re here! They’re at the Toll!” and skidded to a stop as he desperately looked around for a chocobo, chest rising and falling violently.

The roe jumped up from his work table and jogged towards the stable, a happy grin painted on his face. “Kept you waiting for long enough! Take Lulu! She’s the fastest.” he offered as he untied her reigns from the post and helped hoist G’raha onto her saddle.

G’raha gave a thankful shoulder smack to Rammbroes, something that felt odd having never been tall enough to do so before, and bid him farewell as he set the steed on the course to town. He could hear Rammbroes laughing behind him and he turned his head to smile back at him, unable to control his joy.

Twelve days. It had taken twelve long days on the Source, but they were finally home. He could finally hold them again, smell them again, kiss them again, hear their voice again! He had always been excited over their return to the First, but this was different. This was far more important.

_ Thank the gods I bathed yesterday. _

As his breathing steadied a bit more, he realized he left his new robe at the tower and shivered as the air sliced right through his undershirt and the pair of loose shorts sloppily hanging around his waist. No wonder Rammbroes was laughing. He wasn’t about to double back to get it, not when his beloved was so close. So, he settled that he _ could _look more presentable for his hero, but they would understand. Time was of the essence. He needed to be there _ now. _

Lulu kwehed as she rushed under the archway to Revenant’s Toll and slid across the walkway as G’raha pulled her back. Before she could fully stop, he lept off of her and she flapped her wings as she circled the aetheryte, clearly flustered and warking angrily. The Chocobokeep rushed to grab her and G’raha nodded an apology as he tripped his way inside the building. He ran straight into Alisaie, who grunted loudly as they both tumbled to the floor.  
  
“Gods, there you are!” she said as she climbed back to her feet and grabbed G’raha’s hand. “They are in the Solar. Come on!”

He was happily dragged through the building, grinning madly as his mind raced to think of what to say or what to do first. He had thought of it several times before, but now it was all blank as the same thing repeated in his mind.

  
  
_ They’re here! _

Alisaie stopped at the door and inhaled slowly as she turned to face G’raha. 

“Are you ready?”

  
  
G’raha nearly yanked her from the door and opened it himself, but he refrained and quickly straightened his hair and checked what little clothes he had on. With a satisfied exhale, he nodded and his ears wiggled happily as his heart raced. Alisaie couldn’t hold back her wide grin as she took him in, his joy contagious.

“Here we go!” she said in a low whisper and he gave her a nod as he fidgeted with his fingers.

The door slowly opened and Alisaie led him in, Thancred being the first person he saw. The gunbreaker nodded towards the fireplace, and seated with their back facing the door was the one person he cherished most in all the stars. He froze in place as reality set in. Finally within reach. Finally here.

They turned their head to see who had walked in, and their eyes went wide as G’raha’s gaze locked onto them, happy tears beginning to form in his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, but all that he could manage was a simple whimper as he dashed forward, wishing to be in their embrace. Wishing to finally close the gap that the rift had caused between them for far too long.

Before he could make contact however, they rose to their feet and backed away, face contorting into a pained frown. That expression sliced through G’raha like a blade and he stared back, dumbfounded and hurt.

“It-It’s me…” he stuttered, ears drooping slightly. “It’s G’ra-G’raha.”  
  
Thancred and Alisaie were both just as shocked as they looked at the Warrior in confusion.

“We told you he was here! What sort of madness-” Alisaie started before Thancred raised a hand to silence her so the Warrior could respond.

“That’s not my G’raha.”

The comment was blunt, harsh, and made Alisaie huff in disbelief. Thancred squinted his eyes at the Warrior before walking over to G’raha, placing a hand on his back. The gesture caused G’raha to straighten and he looked at Thancred for guidance before attempting to speak. Thancred shot him a look that said to tread carefully and G’raha swallowed before locking his eyes to the Warrior’s once more.

“But I _ am _your G’raha. Please, my frien-”   
  
“You are NOT!” the Warrior cut him off with a bitter tongue and began trembling. “And _ don’t _ call me that!” 

Thancred swiftly stepped in front of G’raha as his ears pinned down, happy tears mixing with ones of sadness as he blinked. Alisaie was quick to take Thacred’s place at G’raha’s side, her hand caressing his back as she glared daggers at the Warrior.

Thancred’s nostrils flared as he crossed his arms and stared down the Warrior. “He has waited nearly two weeks for your arrival and this is how you go about it? Pray, tell me you wish to try this again.”

“That is not _ him _ .” The Warrior insisted as they shook their head and trembled, “He’s not the one I-...he isn’t_ my _ G’raha. I know him yes, but you don’t understand! My G’raha is gone!”   
  


_ No...please, twelve no... _

  
“I’m right here!” the reply came out choked and G’raha clenched his fists hard enough that his nails cut into his palms. Alisaie rubbed her hand faster on his back looked at G’raha with concern, her mind scrambling to figure out what to say. All that left her lips were incoherent grumbles and curses under breath.   
  
Several moments of tense silence followed as the Warrior of Light repeatedly glanced at the miqo’te peeking passed Thancred’s arm at them. Those red eyes tugged at their heart and they could feel a glimmer of hope bubbling in their chest despite how much they fought it. He looked so upset, so hurt. They wanted to sweep him into their arms and hold him. They wanted to kiss away the tears dripping from the corners of his eyes.

_ But- _

“Prove it to me, then.” they settled as they wiped their eyes. “What was the last thing you and I did together? Just us. Should be easy enough to answer. Where were we and what were we doing?”  
  
G’raha brushed passed the Scions protecting him and wiped away the wetness on his cheeks with his palm. He couldn’t hold back the small smile as he recalled them getting ready for the day. He had made that cake and had spent most of the morning packing the basket for the picnic. The Warrior’s hand resting on the small of his back as they placed a tender kiss atop his left ear, making it twitch and them laughing in response. So vivid a memory, so easy to remember.   
  
“We were getting ready to go-” G’raha began and then his face twisted into something more painful. Memories. Now there were too many memories. 

The Warrior kissing his cheek, but also walking with him to the Tower with Cid and the others. The Warrior teasing him in the early morning hours for packing so many books in his bag and also trying to sneak a taste of the berry frosting on the cake. Him stealing a kiss, but also wishing he had the courage to tell his hero how he felt.

“We were...the Tower...and Cid? The campsite…but-” he held his head as he fumbled his words with his thoughts, sharp knives slicing through his mind. He could feel Alisaie and Thancred’s hands holding him up as he lost his balance. Words. They were saying words, but he couldn’t comprehend them as swarms of visions played, all conflicting with each other yet confirming.

Wincing, G’raha tried to focus on the correct memory. He looked up at his beloved, his hero, his inspiration, and fixated on the hurt in their eyes. 

_ No! I’m- _

“There was-!”

“Enough!” the Warrior cried, having hit their limit. “You are_ not _him. You’ll never _ be _him!” 

Hot streams of tears were pouring down their face as they clenched their fists. Reliving it all. They were reliving losing him all over again. The agony was clear in their face.

_ I’m him! _

G’raha gasped at the words and shot his hand out to try and reach them. To try and make them stop for a moment. To let him just_ touch. _His legs failed him as they lost all strength and Thancred quickly supported him, looping a sturdy arm around his waist. G’raha kept his hand raised, yearning, praying just for a moment.

“You will_ never _know his sacrifices! _ Never _ know how much he loved-!” The Warrior broke into a sob as they lost the will to finish speaking.

“Damn you! Stop your ludicrous babbling and let him think! You don’t understand-”  
  
“**YOU **don’t understand!” the Warrior cut the elezen off and slammed their fist against the wall behind them. Alisaie huffed angrily and marched towards her comrade, her own hand in a fist and ready to make contact, but the Warrior sidestepped her and ran towards the door. Alisaie started to chase, but was halted by a loud cry from the Miqo’te wilting in Thancred’s arms.

“Let them go, Alisaie.” Thancred said as the Warrior slipped out of sight. “Perhaps they’ll be more receptive once their tantrum has ended.”

The Elezen make a sucking sound between her teeth and turned her gaze back to G’raha, the sight of him twisting her insides. Her anger stilled as she moved to embrace G’raha, stroking his hair as his tears flowed.

“But...I do remember. It’s there...I’m-”

“We know, G’raha.” Alisaie spoke softly and exhaled deeply as she tried her best to console. “Calm yourself and know that we won’t rest until the Warrior does as well.”

Thancred patted the miqo’te’s shoulder as he agreed, “And they can’t go anywhere we can’t find them.”

_ Unless...they flee back to… _

G’raha wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and he summoned the strength back to his legs, heart pounding steadily in his ears. Their touches were soothing and helped stir his resolve as he sniffed and stared at the door.

“Why don’t we go for drinks and-” Thancred said before he was silenced by a shake of G’raha’s head.

“I have spent far too much of my life waiting,” G’raha spoke with determination and a slight quiver. A concerned look was shared by his friends and he gave them a reassuring smile before hugging them in thankfulness.

_ I have no more time to waste. _

“I’ll fix all of this.”

~0~0~0~0~

It hadn’t taken G’raha long to find the Warrior. He had feared they would use an aetheryte to put as much distance between them as possible or _ worse _. However, their gentle crying was carried on the breeze and led the miqo’te just outside of the Toll’s gates.

Gingerly, he walked and tried to not disturb the dirt under his boots as he crept to the source of the sound. A petite tree barely hid the Warrior’s body and G’raha’s shoulders and ears drooped as he watched their body shake with sobs. He fought the urge to rush over and pull them into his arms and instead waited until the aura around them calmed. It was excruciating, but it gave him a bit more time to compose his own thoughts.   
  


Finally, the moment came and he approached the tree, choosing to sit with his back on the opposite side to the Warrior. They knew he was there, but instead of leaving, they sat in silence and gave off a very cold shoulder. It was childish and G’raha couldn’t help a small amused sigh as he recalled when they scolded him for such behavior in his youth. Now was not the time to scold, however, and he stretched out a hand to draw in the dirt.

_ Where do I start? _

“I’m...sorry for what pain I have caused you. For the pain I have caused to everyone. It was never my intention to…” his words drifted as he frowned, not satisfied with his approach. His ears twitched as he heard the Warrior shift slightly and he dug his nails into the ground as he thought again.

“Mayhap…” he began and swallowed the words back down. 

_ Would it be enough? _

His mind raced with doubt and worry, but he sighed and steadied himself as he pulled the memory from his mind. “Mayhap when you are free and I can slip away for a while,”   
  


_ Was that how I said it? Or am I remembering the wrong one... _

The Warrior gasped and looked over their shoulder. In his peripheral vision, G’raha could see their puffy eyes wide and waiting as they listened. A ping of anxiety gripped his chest and throat as he feared his mind would split again, but with trembling hands, he pushed on. He needed to do this. He needed to prove himself.  
  
“...We could go exploring? Our own adventure for two.” he spoke in almost a whisper as he finally met their eyes, hoping that they could peer into his gaze and finally see _him.   
_

“What did you just say…?” they questioned as they came to their hands and knees, no longer using the tree as cover. G’raha could see the hope swelling within them and he felt the same, but ordered himself to stay put until all doubt had been removed now that he had their attention.

_ Focus... _

“We were in your room at the _ Pendants _.” G’raha began and was sure to emphasize the location. 

_ I’m going to fix this. _

“I had spent the night and you awoke as I was preparing food for the picnic. You were wearing a _ green _nightshirt and your smallclothes. And you had _ terrible _bedhead that you didn’t bother fixing until I teased you for it.”

The Warrior shuffled to G’raha’s front as they listened, mouth open and eyes misty as they carefully listened to every detail.

“You had gotten up and tried to_ stick your finger _ in the frosting on the cake and I smacked your hand away.” a hint of annoyance was in his voice at that particular part, “And it was a _ berry _ frosting that had a _ purple _ color which you said reminded you of a flower from your childh-” 

G’raha froze as that familiar ache slammed into his skull and his memories began to scramble again. He yelped and reached to grab his head, but before he could, the Warrior cupped his face and stared at him desperately. Their eyes darted over him as they looked for answers and G’raha whimpered. The pain and chaos in his mind dulled his senses, but not enough that he wasn’t aware he finally had what he desired. 

_ Their warmth… _

He pressed his cheeks into their palms and turned his face to kiss at their flesh, relief washing over him when they didn’t retreat. 

“It’s me…” he said meekly as his fingers curled around the backs of their hands, “I’m _ your _ G’raha...please…”

_ Warmth_. 

He suddenly became completely enveloped in their warmth as he was lifted and pulled into their arms. 

_ ...the Warrior...they are holding me…they are… _

The miqot’e bit his lip and buried his face into their collar as the vision of the last time they held him played in his mind. Such a bitter thing to remember now. He was so weak then. 

_ So cold… _

G’raha pushed the thought away, his mind slowed, and he lost himself not in the past or the past of the past, but the present. The now. 

_ No more cold. Just warmth. _

Inhaling sharply to take in their scent, he could tell how distraught they had been. He could smell the stress. He could smell the pain. Under it all, however, it was _ them _and that was all that mattered. He was alive. They were alive. They were_ here. _ And_ he _ was here.

G’raha wrapped every part of him that could latch onto the Warrior. Arms, legs, tail, and lips as he kissed their neck. A crushing squeeze pulled him as close as he could physically get, but he did not fight it as he returned the intensity of the hug. They could snap him in two for all he cared just so long as it was _ them_.

He suddenly jumped as the sensation of their hair and lips on his own neck tickled his once crystalized skin and he couldn’t hold back the laughter and squirming that followed. Hot breath danced over the same place before the Warrior lifted their head, prompting G’raha to crane his neck back to meet their eyes.

Their eyes were no longer icy and cold, but sparkling with more love than G’raha had ever remembered them carrying. Their gaze softened as they reached to stroke his cheek and then his lips, to which he kissed their thumb like he always had during late nights tangled with each other. G’raha felt his heart leap as their hand dropped to his chin and raised it to meet their lips. How many times had they done such motions together? Dozens, no, hundreds?

Yet this time, it felt like the first time all over again as he drowned in the kiss. The familiar softness of their lips and the taste of them set a part of him on fire and he wished it to never be put out. He was happy. He was _ free_.

The kiss was broken and he mourned the loss of contact for but a second before the Warrior pressed their foreheads together and their body trembled against him.

“I’m sorry…” they whispered as they grasped onto the thin fabric of G’raha’s undershirt. “I thought I…I thought-”

G’raha gently shushed and tightly embraced them. “No, I’m sorry, my friend. There’s so much to explain...”

The Warrior’s lip quivered at his words and they inhaled quickly as they leaned to steal another kiss, and another, and another…and G’raha gasped as he found himself being lowered onto his back.

“An inn room would be far more suitable for such activities.” a familiar taunting voice startled them out of their love dazed state.

Thancred was watching and smirking from the path to the town with Alisaie looking as relieved as she had ever been.

“And I’m glad I didn’t need to beat you to your senses,” Alisaie remarked as she crossed her arms and giggled lightly at G’raha shyly hiding himself behind the Warrior’s body.

The Warrior stared at them from over their shoulder and rubbed the small of G'raha's back in a loving manner before they finally responded.

"Thank you for taking care of him. And...I'm sorry for-"  
  
"Yes, yes. You were an absolute jackass and now it is time to sweep your beloved off his feet and make up for all that unneeded time lost. Don't dally now."  
  
"Thancred!" Alisaie scolded the hyur who simply shrugged.  
  
"We were all thinking it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, life is messy right now, but I finally buckled down and finished up this chapter! I apologize for errors (mostly formatting because for some reason, Ao3 doesn't translate what I format to begin with well) and hopefully I can tweak and adjust once I get some errands done, but I so desperately wanted to get this posted, I decided to bite the bullet.
> 
> Hopefully, the little jesting at the end helped shake off a lot of that ouch I have been writing x_x It seemed like a Thancred thing to say AND YES WE WERE ALL THINKING IT.
> 
> All that remains now is a final chapter to show some change. A small time skip will happen so who knows what'll happen >>


	6. Move Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time flows, we grow, and the future becomes the now.

The morning la noscean sun gently brightened the room and stirred G’raha from his dreamless slumber. He groaned and reached to rub his eyes, but realized both his arms were trapped under a strong, familiar arm. Memories of the night before trickled back into his mind and he pressed his bare back against the body of his beloved, feeling their chest rise and fall with their steady breaths. 

It was one of the best feelings he could ever experience.

If his bladder would have allowed, he would have stayed in their grasp for however long it took for them to awaken, but much to his dismay it wouldn’t. G’raha had plans today anyways which he needed to begin preparing for before he missed his departure time and left Cid waiting at the airship landing.

He squirmed and tapped their legs with his tail as he mumbled, “Wake up...I need to go.”

The Warrior inhaled sharply and shifted on the bed, causing it to shake, but did not release him. Instead, they pulled the miqo’te closer and buried their face into his hair with a content sigh. G’raha hated to ruin the moment.

“I’ll come back, I promise, but please let me…” he started in a louder tone as he wriggled about.

  
  
“Mmmm...no. You’re my captive, G’raha Tia. Never to escape...” the Warrior replied sleepily and kissed the top of his head.

G’raha snorted at the remark and tilted his head to whack them in the face with an ear, earning him an annoyed groan. Mimicking their voice, he groaned back and managed to turn himself over completely to face them. Their eyes were tired and they had the sweetest smile tugging their lips that made his heart flutter.

_ I could stay like this forever if only- _

“This_ captive _needs the restroom.” he played along and gingerly kissed them. Their lips formed into a pout against his and they begrudgingly eased their hold, to G’raha’s relief. As he slipped away, the Warrior watched him intently and the wheels of their mind started properly working again. 

Worry.

  
  
They were always worried. 

However, today they were worried beyond their typical reasons.

  
  
“G’raha?” they called as they heard the washbasin faucet turn on.

“Hm?”

  
“Are you sure you will be fine traveling back to Mor Dhona on your own? If you postponed it until tomorrow, I could come and-”

“I cannot. I wish not to keep_ her _ from her duties longer than needed and the sooner I can get back to the Tower-”

  
  
The Warrior huffed loudly at his reasoning, loud enough for G’raha’s ears to pick up on it and twitch in frustration. He stared at his face in the mirror and sighed, not wanting a conflict so early in the day. 

_ Conflict was a strong word for it. Perhaps dispute is more accurate. _

He couldn’t blame the Warrior at all for it either. Had he been in their position, he would have felt the same. Even suggested the same. And to be honest, if it hadn’t been for his pre-arrangements, he would have waited for them or one of the Scions to accompany him. Not because he_ needed _an escort, but because it would ease his lover’s mind.

_ And ease my nerves. Gods, what would she think of me now? It’s been so long. _

Running his fingers through his loose hair, G’raha inhaled slowly and exhaled any tension he briefly held. With a small smile, he peeked his head out from the doorway and eyed the Warrior, who was lost in thought.

“Hey,” he began, “All of the Source is counting on you. _ I’m _counting on you. It wouldn’t be fair of me to steal the people’s hero from them in their time of need.”

  
  
Their eyes fell back on G’raha and there was a pain in them that tugged at his heart.

“This hero sometimes wishes they could be but a normal adventurer.” 

It was such a bitter thing to speak and they clamped their mouth shut, regretful of saying it aloud.

Without wasting another moment, G’raha’s feet carried him back to the bed and the Warrior averted their gaze in shame, forcing G’raha to take their chin with his hand and coax their attention back on him.

“If this hero were but a normal adventurer, I’d never have the chance to toy with them and steal their prized crystals,” he said with a playful ear wiggle and flick of his tail. The Warrior’s expression changed to one that made the apples of their cheeks irresistible to kiss. 

_ Twelve…their smile… _

G’raha grinned back at them as he pressed their foreheads together and the Warrior quipped, “You are awfully good at stealing things.”

  
  
Quirking an eyebrow, G’raha tilted his head to kiss their lips. The Warrior hummed into the kiss and their hand raised to tangle in his hair, prompting G’raha’s ears to perk in response.

  
“Like kisses. You’re_ very _good at stealing those.” they whispered against his lips and he helped himself to a few more, much to their delight. However, as their movements slowed, G’raha could sense their mind falling back to the day that awaited them.

Sighing, he shifted back to clearly look at their saddened face and he stroked their cheek tenderly.

_ What I would give to lift every burden from your shoulders and steal you to a far off place without the Empire and without the threat of the Ascians looming over. _

G’raha frowned at his vain wishes and pulled them into a tight embrace that they gladly entangled themselves in. The silence was comforting as they simply listened to the other’s breathing and the sound of fingers weaving through hair. Unfortunately, it lasted only a few moments as their peace was broken by the obnoxious horn that signaled the start of the day in Limsa. 

“My love...I need to-”

  
  
“You need to get ready...I know.”

The disappointment in the Warrior’s voice made G’raha feel so defeated, but he pushed those feelings down as he put on a confident grin. 

“I’ll be fine. I haven’t had an episode in nearly three weeks now and I’ll have Tataru keeping an eye on me. Not to mention Rammbroes will be nearby. _ And _I will have my linkpearl-” G’raha stopped mid-sentence as the Warrior suddenly sat up and kissed him on the cheek, keeping the contact for several heartbeats. 

With a slight quiver in their voice, they said, “I’m sorry if I make you feel like a child at times. I just...don’t want to lose you again. And this is the first time since I’ve been back that I won’t be close by…forgive me.”

G’raha hugged the Warrior tightly and repeated what he had said to them the night before last when he first told them he was leaving to see his old friend.

“I need to get stronger so that you can depend on me as I depend on you. I wish not to be an extra burden, but someone you can rely on when you need it most.” 

_ I need to be strong for Ryne. For Lyna whom I will support even with the distance now between us. _

He spoke with conviction and shifted to hold their face in his hands, locking his ruby eyes to theirs, “_ We stand together. _”

Closing their eyes to allow the words to sink in, the Warrior stroked the backs of his hands with their fingers and breathed in. As they huffed out in their usual fashion and looked at their lover once more, the heroic glint in their pupils returned and they gave G’raha a confident nod. 

“We stand together!” they repeated with vigor and stole a kiss themselves before letting G’raha slip from their arms to wiggle into his clothes.

It had been hard to believe two months had already passed since they reunited and separating hurt them deeply in their chest. But this would be the first of many times they would need to part ways. Ripping a bandage off a wound was never easy, but bandages had to be changed and life had to move forward. It would be unfair and unhealthy to refuse to.

  
  
And if G’raha was ready, then they would have to be to.

“Hey, G’raha?” the Warrior asked as they stood to help the miqo’te braid his hair.

  
  
“Yes?”

  
  
“Be sure to tell Krile I said hello.”

  
  
~0~0~0~0~

The Mor Dhona air was like a ‘welcome home’ to G’raha’s lungs as he stepped off the airship. With the Empire forces abandoning most of their bases nearby, the ease of traveling this way would be more of a commonality once the new landing was finished. Something G’raha was looking forward to taking advantage of more in the future.

  
  
“I appreciate you taking the time to fly me back, my friend.” G’raha said with a friendly smile as he turned to Cid at the helm.

  
  
“This nothing of it. I needed to swing by to check on progress here anyway. A quick detour to the home of the Maelstrom is barely an inconvenience.” Cid replied as double-checked the control panels and quieted the engine.

  
  
“Tis a pity Biggs and Wedge could not accompany us.”

  
  
“Ah, they have their hands full with our current project. You’ll see them sure enough, I promise you.”

G’raha toppled slightly as Cid smacked him heartily on the back without him being prepared. He waved off the engineer’s concern and apologies before straightening and flashing a grin. 

“I look forward to it!”

The two retrieved their travel packs and marched towards the Toll, entertaining each other with conversation of the Allag secrets recently uncovered. The talk ceased once a cheery voice rang on the wind and G’raha’s ears shot up happily at the familiar tone.

  
  
“Raha! My Raha! Do my eyes deceive me?! Oh, how long has it been?” Krile asked excitedly as she waved at her old companion, ears on her hood swaying with the movement.

  
  
G’raha nodded a farewell to Cid and picked up his pace, joyfully dropping to his knees once the distance had closed. He accepted the warm hug from the lalafell, grinning ear to ear as they both rocked back and forth, prolonging the embrace. Krile was the one who finally pulled back, eyes sparkling with happiness.

“Let me get a look at you!” she remarked as she held his face in her hands and turned his head about to examine him. The gesture warmed his heart and reminded him of days long passed when they were studying together and he’d ask her to check on his appearance. 

“None the worse for wear and look at that smile!” Krile teased as G’raha shook her hands away. He spotted Cid walking by with an amused look, likely caught off guard by the motherly treatment he was receiving.

“And look at you! You haven’t changed a bit, Krile.”

  
  
She smirked at the compliment and swooped her bangs from her face, “Well, we’ve haven’t been apart_ that _long. You expected me to be an old maiden?”

That comment stirred something in the miqo’te that reminded him just how different their lives were now to each other. There was even a time that he thought he’d never speak to her again, yet here they were, catching up like old friends do.

  
  
“It honestly feels like a _ century _ since I last saw you,” G’raha said truthfully as he reached to pat the side of her arm. Krile’s eyes saw some of that truth as a brow raised quizzically for a split second before she returned to a soft smile. Backing up and turning on her heels, she beckoned him to get up and follow as she walked towards the markets and dining.

  
“Well then, let’s make up for all that lost time, shall we?”

  
  
~0~0~0~0~

Krile had finally finished telling G’raha all of their discoveries from Eureka, a conversation that took a couple of hours with G’raha’s questions woven in, and she beamed as her friend excitedly finished scribbling in his journal. He had barely touched his food the entire time he had been so entranced.

“I must admit, hearing all of this is very vindicating.” the miqo’te remarked with a flick of his tail, “I look forward to traveling back to see it all for myself!”

  
  
“Well, you should feel vindicated. Without your theories, we would have been far more blind in our exhibitions. I will have you know I credited you in some of our findings.” Krile said as she sipped her ale.

  
  
G’raha’s eyes widened and he warmly replied, “Oh, thank you for that kindness. Though, I wasn’t there so I don’t feel I deserve it.”

  
  
Krile was taken aback and tugged on the sleeves of her coat as she eyed him up and down in disbelief. “Don’t deserve it? I would have expected you to be jumping for joy and rubbing your victory in everyone’s face you could find.”

  
  
He could easily see his younger self doing that and he turned his face away in embarrassment as Krile continued her assessment,  
  
“You have changed! What in the Twelves' names have you been doing in the time since we last spoke? Surely something remarkable must have happened in that Crystal Tower out there.” she said as she pointed towards the glowing tower in the distance.

  
G’raha chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck anxiously, debating whether or not to speak the full truth or lace it with convenient lies. Her gaze tore into him and he remembered how poor of a liar he was, knowing full well that she’d pick him apart if he tried to hide the story.

  
  
“ 'Tis not a story you'd easily believe." he conceded.

"Oh, I'd be willing to give it a sure try. Look at you! Everything about you seems_ different_. Even the way you sit! All prim and proper with no slouch!" Krile stood from her seat at the table and G’raha retreated into his shoulders. "- and not once have you tried to smart at me. Who is this man before me? Has little Raha finally grown up?"

G’raha ached a bit under his innocent smile.

_ Has too much time passed? Will she no longer enjoy my company as I am now? _

Despite his concerns, a fleeting thought passed through that made his ear twitch and his expression turn to one of teasing, “If I have grown up, then surely you must have some gray hairs hidden under that hood you’re keeping from me.”

There was a pregnant pause as Krile’s jaw dropped and she eyed G’raha sideways, “Ah! Little Raha is still in there, just quieter and needing some coaxing. I’ll have you know, if there are any gray hairs on this head, there is precisely a 78 percent chance they are your doing.” she said as she crossed her arms and smirked.

  
  
“ _ Only _ 78?” he said with a playful tilt of his head and the both of them busted into hearty laughter they hadn’t shared in a long time. Once they settled, G’raha finally took a bite of his now cold food and winced, but decided not to let Krile’s kindness of paying go to waste. 

After taking a healthy gulp that finished off her drink, the lalafell plopped back down into her seat and rested her cheek against her knuckle. 

“Joking aside, Raha, what has happened? Can you confide the tale to me?”

Having already decided in his mind, G’raha swallowed the food currently in his mouth and sighed before speaking.

  
  
“Only if you are willing to give the time and listen with an open mind.”

  
  
“I always do, Raha.”

  
  
~0~0~0~0~

  
Krile’s head twisted and turned around in awe as G’raha led her to the Ocular. The Tower’s architecture and design had her asking all manner of questions and wheezing as they ascended the staircase to his chambers. Despite her protests at first, Krile finally accepted his offer to carry her the rest of the way, allowing her to catch her breath and observe her surroundings more carefully.

  
  
“And you’ve managed to re-establish a connection to the First?!” she exclaimed as he detailed for her what he was about to do.

  
  
“It isn’t as strong as the one I managed before and currently, I can’t bring anyone there or here, but I can make contact with some help.”

  
  
“From Minfil- I mean..”

  
  
“Ryne.” he corrected as his walking slowed once the doors came into view. Carefully, he let Krile down onto the tile and she brushed her clothes to press out the wrinkles.

  
  
“Yes, Ryne. And how long will it take?”

  
  
“Hopefully, naught but a handful of breaths. Come.”

  
  
He welcomed her inside and she trotted in as if she were walking into her very own residence. The motion made him laugh lightly under his breath and he gently shut the door behind them, peeking over his shoulder as she took in the room.

  
“Absolutely stunning!” she remarked, spinning on her heels and eyes darting around the room. Krile stopped as she followed G’raha’s gaze to where the link to the First was and she tilted her head. “Not much of a _ mirror _.”

The miqo’te shook his head and lifted his newly crafted staff off its resting place by the wall. Simplistic in its design. its silver metal reflected the blue hues of the crystal far brighter than his previous staff had and he found it much easier to work with after he had become properly acquainted with it. He reminded himself to thank Urianger for the gift again once his current whereabouts were known and then cleared his mind.

  
  
“Let me concentrate for one moment…” he requested and positioned himself in front of the mirror, channeling aether to flow through him and carry his message. “Let expanse contract...eon become instant…”

Krile took several quiet steps back and watched curiously as he chanted.

  
  
_ Ryne. Please come to the Ocular at the earliest convenience. _

The energy left him swiftly and he gasped. His ears pivoted as he heard Krile begin to dash towards him, but he stopped her with the raise of his hand and focused back onto the rift. Faintly, he heard the reply.

  
  
_ “I’m here! Ready when you are.” _

  
  
With a relieved exhale, he linked his aether to hers and together they worked the spell as they had practiced before, his staff aimed directly at the mirror as he concentrated. The crystal before him rippled and danced with vibrant colors before an image finally became clear.  
  
Before them, beyond the rift and to the Crystal Tower in the First, stood Ryne, dressed in a very fitting yellow tunic, freshly tailored slops, and well-worn boots. Krile gasped loudly and walked to stand by G’raha, eyes wide and jaw open in disbelief.

  
  
“Oh!” Ryne said with a startled jump, “Um, hello!”

  
  
G’raha straightened his back and regained his composure before introducing them, “Ryne, this is my dear friend, Krile. We studied together for many years.”

  
  
Ryne politely waved and said a soft, “Hello, Krile, nice to meet you!” to which Krile returned the greeting with more enthusiasm than the young girl was expecting.

  
  
“This is...Raha...this is absolutely fantastic!” the lalafell exclaimed, “To think that this is achievable!”

  
  
G’raha and Ryne both grinned bashfully as they listened to Krile’s excited comments, answering her questions and theorizing what they could potentially manage with the right tools and enough practice. Soon, time began running out as the portal image began to warp and both of its summoners began to tremble. 

“We’re losing the connection.” he stated to his companion before turning back to the mirror, “Ryne, please take care and tell Lyna to expect a letter soon.”

  
  
“You too! And tell everyone I miss them! And tell Thancred I’m keeping up with my training! And-”

  
  
The portal dissipated and the miqo’te dropped to his knees, panting and wheezing as the spell broke. Krile in a panic began to fan his face and grabbed his wrist to check his pulse. Once his breathing stabilized, he patted her hand and nodded at her to show he was alright, and she sighed in relief.

  
  
“That was something else! And what a fine girl that Rynie is.”

  
  
“_Rynie_?”

  
  
“Yes,_ Rynie_. I look forward to potentially meeting her in person one day. First, however, we must find an optimal way to bridge the distance.” Krile began to ponder as she raised a hand to her chin. “Perhaps Eureka has an answer…”

  
  
Bringing himself back onto his feet, G’raha shook off his robes and gripped his staff as he assessed its condition after the longest “call” he had done yet. Holding up far better than the wooden one he had been trying to use before. The hairs on the back of his neck prickled as he felt Ryne reaching to him again from across the stars.

  
“ _ And tell the Warrior to not worry about hurrying back. We all have things under control!” _

_ I will! Don’t strain yourself and go rest up. We’ll speak again soon. _

G’raha broke the bond between them and focused back on his companion who was pacing along the tile, following the golden patterns on the floor absentmindedly.

  
  
“Eureka may have the answer, but what I know now comes from the Tower’s own collection of tomes. You are welcome to read them at your leisure. You may find something I missed.” His suggestion made Krile perk up and give him a look of determination he hadn’t seen since their last project together. It was good to see again. _ Really _good. _  
_

_  
_“Ah, I am the reason you didn’t fail your writing courses because I caught all your mistakes you missed. Lead the way and I’ll get started!”

  
  
He let her have the jab with a snort and lead her towards his ‘new” study that had already been filled up with books much like his old one. “Now?”

  
  
“Yes _ now_. Come now, Raha. You don’t expect to dangle such a grand discovery in front of my face and expect me not to want to sink my teeth into it! Now is better than later!”

  
Chuckling at her eagerness, he gave in and rolled up his sleeves.

  
  
~0~0~0~0~

_ To my dearest Lyna, _   
  
_ I apologize for how long it has taken me to respond. Much has happened between our correspondence that needed my attention. I hope you are well. _   
_  
I am happy to hear of the new construction in Lakeland! It brings me the greatest joy to know more people are settling outside of the Crystarium. Has the new town a name yet? Is anyone I know intending to live there?_

_ And in regards to your question, I have observed the fighting styles here for chakrams and can say with confidence they are near identical to the styles on the First. Very peculiar how that seems to be, but not entirely surprising. I will be traveling to Kugane in the coming days where I shall investigate further in case I have missed something. It’s actually a place I have never visited myself, so I am excited to take in the sights. _

_ You may find it silly to know just how little of the Source I have been to despite it being my native world, but I was young when I sealed myself away and had been distracted with finding answers to my purpose. Ah, enough of my rambling about that. I will have the Warrior of Darkness take pictures with their tomestone to show you upon their next visit. From what drawings I have seen, you’d love the place. Oh, how I wish I could walk with you through the streets. I imagine you would look as wide-eyed as you did your first week at the Crystarium! One of my fondest memories I will have you know. _

_ Mayhaps one day… _   
_  
Are you remembering to get plenty of rest? Please make sure you eat your breakfast every morning. And yes, before you remark, “And what of your breakfast” I will have you know, the Warrior and our friends are intent on making sure I miss no meals. So rest easy and keep yourself nourished._

_ Please write back soon and remember I am always by your side in spirit. With every step. _

_ With all the love in the cosmos, _ _  
_ _ Your Papap _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI THIS IS VERY BITTER SWEET TO PUBLISH.
> 
> I sat on this, half finished and lamenting having to finally bring this fic to a close for several days. Finally, with much encouragement from a friend, I bit the bullet and wrote it out fully.
> 
> Nearly all of this chapter was planned and partially written before I published the first chapter. I adore Krile and G'raha's relationship (please go through Eureka. She speaks of him fondly and it melts my heart how she called him "Raha") and I dearly hope we get to see them interact in game one day. Or at the least talk of each other more.
> 
> I did say Ryne would return and this would end on a happy note! With the three of them working together, they are bound to find a way to bring Ryne to the Source and back to dad Thancred. I have hope!
> 
> I actually have a document I filled up with letters I like to think Lyna and G'raha sent back and forth to each other as they continued on their own paths. If you're curious to how she responded to him being alive and elsewhere, it took her time to let it sink in, but she was overwhelmingly happy to know he was still out there, if not overwhelmed to know the truth of his existence there. Currently, no one else besides she and Ryne on the First know of his fate and it will likely stay that way to protect the people of the First from knowing other shards exist. 
> 
> And it is my HC that she called him "Papap" as a little one and no one can take this from me.
> 
> This has been one hell of a journey and I thank all of you that have read and joined me in this adventure.
> 
> I'd like to especially thank:
> 
> sandorara for giving me that inspirational nudge to write this angst fest to begin with and screaming with me in the background about how stupid this WoL is. Please go read about her lovely boy G'yozah and fall in love with him as much as I have. <3
> 
> All of my commenters, but especially Saraku for liveblogging through the entire thing in the comments and giving me lovely paragraphs of screaming to look forward to <3 You've been here from the start and you are amazing.
> 
> nagihikos for getting mad that I sent her this without the final chapter and giving me that last kick in butt to get this finished. Ilu <3
> 
> And just, thank you everyone.
> 
> (P.S. I may or may not write some rated E of that lovely first night back in each other's arms that Thancred so rudely interrupted. We shall see :3c)
> 
> I am also on twitter now! @DraiochtEve though I can't promise I'll be very active. Most likely will be mentioning my writing adventures.
> 
> Have a lovely day everyone!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading <3 Every hit, kudo, and comment is greatly appreciated.


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